Read #5 - #3 here, and #2 here

#1 Trust Him

This is the biggest thing that I am learning. I think it will always be the toughest thing to learn, and I have a feeling that it will be a lifelong lesson in trust. No matter what change will always be going on. There will always be issues to deal with. I will always have kids to worry about. Because of this I will always have a need to trust God.

I will always need to trust His plans. I will always need to trust His Love. I will always need to trust His protection. In short I will always need to trust Him.

So knowing this why is it so hard for me to do? I wish I knew, but then again if I knew I wouldn’t need to trust His power in my life. If I knew I would probably presume that I could trust Him on my own. Man, I need His help to even be able to trust Him.

I guess it’s just one of those things. I am learning more and more to give up, because in giving up I leave it to Him. That is the only way I can get by in this life. I spent a few years of my life trying to do it on my own and it didn’t work. The only way to survive this life and thrive for Him is to stop trying and trust His Word, His Will, and His Love.

So lately God has been putting the future on my heart. My family and I are coming to the end of a chapter in our lives and are preparing to move forward to the next one. As with any new beginning there is a certain amount of planning, anxious waiting, and yes…worry.

I know I shouldn’t worry. I know God is in control and I feel that He has given me clear direction on the future, but I still spend time worrying about it. Am I doing the right thing? Should I do this? What if this doesn’t work out? What are my back up plans?

Some of these things are just good planning. I firmly believe that God will take me in the direction He has shown me. But i also believe that he may show me a different path as I move forward, much like He gave Abram a goat to sacrifice instead of Issac. So I am also preparing for other options. I guess the hard thing is just realizing the difference between Planning and Worrying.

I wish I had a good answer as to which is which. I don’t. I am just a finite human, but I do believe that in the end I will be taken care of by a loving and INfinite God. So untill God moves the mountains I am facing I am content to just keep climbing, while also keeping an eye open for other paths that He may open up. I’ll keep planning, and I’ll try and let Him take care of my worrying.

I recently watched the film “Into The Wild”, which if you haven’t seen it was a very interesting story. I love the wild and the thought of living of the land and enjoying the natural beauty of it. Anyway there was a part in the movie where Alex the main character is at the Colorado River and decides that he wants to kayak down it. He goes into the local rangers office and the dialogue is something like this:
(this takes place in 1991)

Alex:”Excuse me I was wondering if you could tell me a good place to launch from so I can paddle down the river”

Ranger:”Do you have any experience?”

A:”No, I just want to paddle down the river. Do I need experience to do that?”

R:”Do you have a permit?”

A:”I need a permit to paddle down a river?”

R:”Yes, If you like you can get on the waiting list for a permit.”

A:”How long is the list?”

R:”Well, lets see…. The next available spot is May 12th…2003.”

A:”12 years, I Have to wait 12 years to paddle down a river?”

At this point Alex leaves goes and buys a Kayak and starts paddling down the river. I assume that he is starting from somewhere around the Colorado/Arizona border, and he ends up paddling all the way down through the Grand Canyon, Lake Mead, Lake Mojave, Lake Havasu, the US/Mexico border and into the Gulf of California.

Alex embarks on this epic journey, all because he wasn’t content with the answers given to him by the establishment. He decides that even though he is being told by those around him that he can’t do something, because it will take too long and he does have the experience, or the right equipment or whatever else, he is going to do it anyway because he feels called to it.

What is it that you are being called to? What is the river in your life that God has told you to paddle down? Who are those that are telling you that you can’t do it for whatever reason; you’re too young, not experienced enough, it will take too long to accomplish, it’s never been done before. What is that river in your life?

God is bigger then all off the excuse people can give you. Don’t wait anymore, if God has called you to paddle down a river, then go buy your kayak and get in the water. You will never be able to experience the beauty and majesty of God’s plan for you if you don’t get in the water.